English Story

Goethes tolerance 歌德的容忍

Goethe was once strolling on a narrow path in a park in Weimar. As luck...

A tiny room

There was a lady from the countryside who came to the city and checked into...

A stingy guy

Matt and his wife lived in the country. Matt was very stingy(吝啬的) and hated...

Safe and sound

A group of friends who went deer hunting separated into pairs for the day....

A proof 证明

A man came to a village post office for a registered letter. The letter was...

Bubba is dead

A couple of rednecks are out in the woods hunting when one of them suddenly...

That man knows the future

Nasreddin was cutting a branch of a tree in his garden. While he was sawing,...

Is there baseball in heaven?

Two ninety year old men, Moe and Sam, have been friends all their lives.  ...

The absent-minded professor 心不在焉的教授

Absent-minded Professor: Heavens! Someone stole my wallet!   Wife: Didn't...

Hunting skills 打猎的技巧

Two Russian hunters meet. I shot a gigantic bear yesterday, says Ivan. Look...

A forgetful man

Man: Doctor, I'm getting very forgetful.   Doctor: I see, Mr. Brown. Won't...

First-aid class 急救课

A man was telling friends how first-aid classes had prepared him for an...

Fishing costs

Two Virginia rednecks go on a fishing trip. They rent all the equipment -...

Room and board

A salesman stopped at a farmhouse one evening to ask for room and board for...

Three feet

Dotty(薄弱的,精神不定的) Aunt Muriel received a letter one morning. While reading...

The plane

Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?   A: She'd just...

No problem 没问题

No Problem A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop. How can I help you?...

Good sight 良好的视力

Good Sight Lawyer: You say you were about thirty-five feet away from the...

Your grandfather 你爷爷

A well dressed young man demanded as soon as he entered the restaurant:...

How much english can you speak?

"Your Honor, I want to bring to your attention how unfair it is for my...

英语作文

以下是发生在台湾的真实故事    某年大学联招英文作文试题 ,请考生看完前段 提示後接着完成全文--提示如下:    One day the black...

Lamb caught in fence

A couple of farmers were walking back across the fields after a boozy lunch...

Very stupid robbers 两个笨贼

Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first robber said, "I hear sirens....

Doctor! doctor! give me the news!

A young doctor had moved out to a small community to replace a doctor who...

Billy jo

it is 10:00 at the police station and there is only 2 officers working that...

Joke: sixty nine

A girl brings a guy home one night. They get into her apartment and...

Telemarketer 电话推销员

I answered the phone one evening and quickly realized the voice on the other...

Joke: playing cards

Little Johnny woke up in the middle of the night and went to the bathroom....

Napoleon was ill

Jack had gone to the university to study history, but at the end of his...

3 big rednecks

A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Wanna hear a...

Save much more

"You will be pleased with me today, mother," said Dick to his mother, coming...

What a big deal 我是来装电话的

What a big deal A young businessman had just started his business, and...

A driving debacle

A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his...

Monkey and policeman 猴子与警察

A policeman took a monkey to his boss. The boss asked, "What kind of monkey...

They're all drowned 他们全都淹死了

The great painter was asked, one day to paint a picture of Pharaoh crossing...

A dollar per point

A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all...

A bilingual city 双语城市

A patron in Montreal cafe turned on a tap in the washroom and got scalded....

Biblical signs

George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white...

Tie and water

A man was crawling across the desert dying of thirst, when a camel raced up...

Psychology

Several international businessmen were on a conference cruise when the ship...

Fight competition

The shopkeeper was dismayed(吃惊) when a brand new business much like his own...

What was it she wanted 她要买什么

A store manager heard a clerk tell a customer. No, ma’am, we haven't had any...

What's time to a pig 时间对猪有什么意义

One day a visitor from the city came to a small rural area to drive around...

How many children?

A census taker in a rural area went up to a farmhouse and knocked. When a...

A businessman's idea 商人的主意

A family moved from the city to the suburbs, and were told they ought to get...

Joke: don't listen to him

A couple had been married for many years, and their son had gotten old...

Computer redneck

10 Ways To Tell If A Redneck Has Been Working On A Computer:   The monitor...

Gallant effort 殷勤

At a dinner party a shy young man had been trying to think of something nice...

To the nines

One day, on 9/9/99, a man woke up at 9:09 a.m. in the morning, jumped on Bus...

Dear redneck son

DEAR REDNECK SON, I'm writing this letter slow because I know you can't read...